Now this may seem like a negative post to begin Mother’s Day with but it’s really not.

You see, I think that there are 3 major ‘fibs’ told to new moms that don’t help in preparing them for motherhood.

The first…..  9 months.  A pregnancy is 9 months/40 weeks.  Who did the calculations on that?   On whose calendar do 40 weeks equal 9 months?  More like 9 1/2-10 months!

The second….. ‘terrible twos’.  Now why does everyone prepare you for the ‘terrible twos’ when the true terror transformation seems to occur at three??  I have yet to meet a mom that’s been through both agree that age two was more of a challenge than age three!  When I meet a mom with a two year old that utters the words “terrible twos” I just can’t bring myself to say “just wait until he/she hits three!!”   (and don’t even mention the teen years!!  yikes!)

Now the first two fibs are comical in their own way.   However, the third, in my opinion, is the one that leaves a new mom the most unprepared.  It’s the worst one.

“It goes by fast.”

I remember at one point in my pregnancy with my first, my daughter Devan, when I looked at my husband and said “I swear if ONE MORE PERSON says ‘enjoy every minute…IT GOES BY FAST’ I might scream!”.   I wanted to say “I know, I know…’it goes by fast’” to everyone before they had a chance to say it to me.

At the time I just didn’t realize that it couldn’t be said enough and it is truly the biggest lie and understatement ever.  There isn’t a word, or a phrase, or any type of warning that can prepare you for just how fast it goes by.

You blink….really, just a blink…. and….

….instead of cradling them in your arms you’re looking up at them towering over you

….crayon drawings and handpainted masterpieces become newspaper clippings of their school sports

….you stop having to introduce them and remind them to say things like ‘please, thank you and nice to meet you’ and instead watch them confidently and politely introduce themselves and engage in a conversation

….you move from taking off training wheels to signing them up for driver’s ed

….instead of celebrating every wiggly tooth you celebrate the day the braces come off

The list goes on and on and on….and on.

And nothing…ABSOLUTELY NOTHING….can prepare you for just how fast it goes by.

I’m not ready.

I wish I could stop time.  No, actually I wish I could rewind.  I love who my kids are right now but I so miss carrying them on my hip or spinning them around in circles while they pretend they can fly.  And I can’t seem to reconcile the fact that in just a few short years they’ll start to head off on their own.  It’s what sends me into their rooms at night just to stare and smile at them while they are sleeping like I’ve done since they day they each were born.  It’s the reason I’ll choose a hockey game, lacrosse game, etc….over anything else.  It’s why I love every minute I spend with them.

I want to freeze every single moment because ‘it goes by fast’ just isn’t true.  It’s so, so much faster than that.

We’ve been going to Walt Disney World for years.  We all love it and we have so many great memories from our trips there.  The very first time we went was a big surprise for the kids.  We didn’t tell them a thing until we were headed to the airport.  There have been many trips since that first one and, of course, each year they are a little older and there are different experiences (and challenges!).

This year, however, was the first year that, quite literally, stopped me in my tracks.  I happened to be walking behind them and realized that neither my husband nor I were holding any hands or watching to make sure no one wandered off.   We weren’t pushing any strollers or carrying sippy cups.

It made me smile and made me sad all at the same time….

It even made me willing to get in a few photos myself!

So, a big HAPPY MOTHER’S DAY to all moms out there.  Enjoy it!

Have fun, spend time together and soak in every single minute.  And don’t forget …..  ’it goes by fast’ is a giant lie.

It’s so much faster than that.

UPDATED 5/12/2013 to add March 2013 family photo (after Devan’s hockey team won the Regional Championship):

And the growing up continues.  I’m now officially the shortest member of our family (by a lot!)….

For some, the decision on where and how to display their family photos can be overwhelming.  If this is you, take a deep breath and understand that there are no ‘right’ or ‘wrong’ ways.  Whatever makes you smile, whatever tells your ‘story’, whatever works for you is the right way.

Many of the families I photograph are repeat clients.  I typically photograph them every year or every other year depending on schedules and geography.   In my opinion, these sessions create the perfect ‘family wall’.  You can start with just a few and add on each year which results in a fabulous photographic history of your family’s growth.

I recently received an email from a client whose family I’ve photographed several times over the years.  To say this family ‘gets me’ is an understatement. In fact, one of the images from one of our sessions together is on the home page of my website and is what I would consider a ‘signature’ image of mine.  It defines exactly the type of  family photography I love.

As you can see, these clients let their children be themselves during the sessions and let me do what I do best (capture their personalities and relationships  and document that particular stage in their lives).  There is never any demands to “smile” or “say cheese”, etc…  The result?   Two exquisite gallery walls (so far!) in their home telling the story of their children.

Here are a few from our most recent session:

This mom has a wonderful plan for the future of these photos…

“So glad we have invested in your photos through the years – when my kids get married for a wedding gift, I will give them each an album of all your pictures.  Won’t that be awesome?”

Yes…Yes it WILL be awesome!  Can’t wait for our next photo session!

This wedding was a marriage of so many perfect elements:  the venue (The Portland Company is such a WOW property….definitely a favorite place of mine), the details, the vendors (I love working with Meghan from B Merry Events!), the people and, of course, Nicole and David themselves.  I can’t put into words just how wonderful Nicole and David are together.  How at ease and comfortable they are with each other but I believe the images below will.

Here is what Nicole had to say about the day:

And Stacey, oh Stacey, you captured it all!  I never thought it was possible to have so much fun with a photographer. You are truly amazing.Thank you for being there.

Look at David’s expression in the photo above.  It says everything.

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VENDORS:

Photographers: Stacey and Scott  Stacey Kane Studio

Wedding Coordinator:  Meghan Torrieri – B Merry Events

Florist:  Emily Carter – Emily Carter Flowers

DJ – Ryan Parker – DJ Ryan Parker

Venue – The Portland Company

Caterer – Beth – A Moveable Feast

Rentals – One Stop Party Shoppe

FANTASTIC job everyone!  I hope to work with all of you again soon!

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I’ll end this post with a note I received after the wedding from Nicole …

Melanie and Stuart chose to have a small, intimate ceremony at a family home on the coast.  When Melanie first contacted us she commented that she was a little hesitant about having a photographer there.  She was concerned about the possibility that a photographer might bring a level of ‘distraction’ with such a small group.  After viewing the galleries on the website she believed that we were ‘totally in tune to this’ and wanted to work with us.   Audra photographed the event with beautiful results.

From Melanie:

It doesn’t take much to amuse me and this combination made it pretty high on my list.  In fact, it’s possible I even begged just a little to let me go back and play again soon!

I’ll chase kids and chickens over stiff and stuffy posing any day!

As much as I love the holidays and everything they encompass (friends, family, birthdays, my wedding anniversary and a whole lotta hockey!), I also look forward to taking a deep breath when it’s over and digging in to the new year.  January is a month of planning, inspiration and a lot of catching up!

This year I decided to do something that I’ve always wanted to do…a 365 Project (366 this year!).  A photo a day, for ME, every day.  In the past,  I’d start out with good intentions and then on January 4th I’d realize I’d already missed the first four days and, well, what was the sense in starting then?

Well, I’m happy to say that this year is different!   I picked up my camera on January 1st, took a photo for me, and have maintained it every day so far.  (yeah…I know…I’m only 8 days into it but I’m still feeling pretty good about it!)  It’s made me pick up my camera again for me and for my family.  I was at a place where I would, more often than not, choose to leave my camera behind when it came to my own family experiences.  I hate to admit it, but bringing my camera with me made me feel like I was ‘working’ and I just wanted to be present and part of whatever activity we were doing.  I am still mindful of that….of being a participant and not just the photographer….but I am also documenting our family more.

Oddly enough, it’s already had another effect on my family.  My kids, who are typically the first to turn away from the camera and groan, are now anxious to see which photo I pick for the day.  :)

Here are my photos from the first week (yes, I cheated twice….there are two photos represented on 2 different days.  I’ll work it out later!)  At this time of year most of my photos revolve around hockey.  With 3 kids playing on 2 teams each and a backyard rink it’s all hockey all the time for us!

My current process is a simple one….I shoot, pick the image of the day, save two files (one for print and one for facebook/blog).  Then I print a 13×19 image on my Epson Stylus Photo R3000 (a fabulous printer…particularly for b/w prints!), date the print along the bottom and add it to an archival storage box.  I have some other ideas when the project is over (a coffee table book, etc…) but for now, I’m doing the two things that I think are most important….saving a digital version and immediately PRINTING one so I have a hard copy.  (something I feel very strongly about…..it’s important to have PRINTS, not just files….of your images).

Check out the following links for more info on 365 Projects…

365 Project

365 Project Blog

photojojo

Flickr Group – Project 365

Digital Photography School – 52 Weekly Themes

If you haven’t started but wish you had, please don’t be like I was and throw in the towel because you didn’t take a photo on day one.  It’s NEVER too late to document the times, places, people, things, etc….that make up your daily life.   I highly recommend it!

Have fun!

I’m pretty sure I had a grin plastered on my face for the ENTIRE shoot!  A big thank you to the family for letting the kids be kids because THAT is what I believe is what is most important to document.  An even bigger thank you for reminding me again how very much I love what I do.

Mairzy and Alex could not have wished for a more perfect day!  The morning hours brought some rain and, for a bit, it didn’t seem as though it would clear up.  However, not long before the ceremony it did just that….the sun came out along with a striking blue sky and it set the stage for a great event!

Here are a few (well, more like a BUNCH!) of images from the day.

Best wishes to you Mairzy and Alex!